Parenting Is NOT For The Faint Of Heart

Raising human beings into responsible adults ain't for the faint at heart!

I never knew I was capable of pissing off three different people all by 7am.

#1 child, 13 years old

Me: Give me your phone.

Him: WHHHHHYYYYY?

ME: If you are grown enough to have a phone you are grown enough to wake yourself up for school. Give me your phone!

Him: (attempting to cuss me out in his head)
Me: Wishing HE would!

Child #2, 8 years old

Me: Did you brush your teeth?
Her: Yes!!Why?
Me: Because I think you might not have brushed long enough.
It's not a big deal just go brush!
Her: No, you can't smell my breath!

Me: Either you didn't brush your teeth or something crawled in your mouth and died. Either way
Please go brush your teeth!

Child #3, 7 years old

Me: Eat!

Him: I don't like the pancakes!

Me: Why not? You have eaten the same ones for years!

Him: The syrup has a log cabin on it. I only eat the syrup with the woman who looks like grandma!

Me: EAT THE PANCAKES!

Drive to school:

Tribe of kids: Silent as a church mouse!

Me:  Laughing out loud while I sing-a-long to my Oldies- But-Goodies station silently daring anyone to change the station!

And praying for Jesus to take the wheel and keep driving!